(Re)Fresh 2011

Refresh was the topic of the day, as i sat in a room of maybe 60 women or so give or take. I thought OK God what in the world do you have me up so early on a Saturday morning for. I know for most 40 something yr. old women 10:00 am is rather late. Not for me i am very young at heart and even though i feel every bit of 40, i try to trick my body with the occasional guilty pleasures of the young, try sleeping till Noon even when i have to crawl out of bed (because my back is stiff and soar). It's really soar i tell my self not because i am a few pounds. over weight, but because my husband waits for me to fall asleep each night so he can roll over me 20 times like a steam roller. It's his way of getting back at me for the occasional nagging i do during the day or the few chores i have for him as he is walking in the door after a long day at school and work.

Anyways i sat there, excited to spend a day with a new friend and kind of nervous well because God does not get me out of bed on a Saturday unless it's something good. Well i wasn't prepared for what was about to happen and i certainly was not ready for it. The topic was "Stories Matter" the one thing i can relate to, you know i sort of sat there shaking my head sort like the old cartoons when they would get hit over the head, I thought maybe everyone at my table saw the stars over my head cause God knocked me silly. He does that at times when he can't get my attention any other way he sort of has to hit me over the head.

Over the years i have used this very spot to sit and challenge myself to pursue God a little harder, or to stop and listen.As you look back through the old posts you see they are pretty sporadic in times, cause well that's sort of how life gets to go for me. It doesn't mean that God is sporadic in my life it means more like i am sporadic in his. I think we are all a little guilty of that.

As the guest speaker began to talk, she challenged us to allow God to use us through our very own stories of our journey in life. to " Say hello and share the work of God." How he teaches me in the unexpected circumstances, pray with blind faith.

You know the one thing i have discovered most challenging in my life these days, is raising teenage girls. Sometimes i think they are raising me instead of it the other way around. I look back and remember how easy it was for me to get them to pick up their rooms. I would say " Girls let's play a game, let's see how many toys we have left on the floor by picking them up one by one and counting them as we put them in their proper place" Now i say "can i help you pick up your room," I either get the look of "stay out of my room", or "OK" and i end up picking up the room while they lay on the bed watching their favorite program. It  was so simple when they were little. Now it's been twisted and mangled by peer pressure, hormones, BOYS, emotional stress( mine & theirs) I use to enjoy being a mother to the most precious darling loving daughters....now i hide and tremble in the closet because those little darlings have turned into confusing, multiple personality young women most days i think i live with Sybil. I was reminded that the "Shadows are a part of life" those are the times when we listen , learn & keep going.

I took a separate class on journal, my passion, We were challenged this year to search a word that we want to learn more about. Something God can teach us, or maybe something we really want to focus on this year. I had many words come to mind, but a word that resonated with me the most was Compassion. Any mother of TEEN daughters needs compassion, with out compassion you spend most of your days with a soar throat from yelling all the things you need them to hear. Of which they could quite frankly give 2 craps about. Your needs and their wants do not line up any longer.

I looked up the definition and then I gulped, and got a little scared because even though this is definitely a gift i need to learn. It may become quite a challenge to teach it to me.

Compassion- A feeling of deep sympathy& sorrow, accompanied by a desire to alleviate the suffering; MERCY

Please for the 2011 yr. jot down my name and pray for me when ever I come to mind, i am just going out on a limb here i am going to need it!

Sincerely,
your compassion less (Not for long) friend
Angie